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Wisdom for Women

It seems that Mother’s Day is the yearly time for people to air various opinions about the worthiness of such a day. I have read many articles over the past couple years related to this topic and this is my heartfelt response. It is not meant to harm anyone, but simply to share this mother’s point of view on the beauty of Mother’s Day.  Blessings to all born to a mother.

I am a mother. My children, ages 21, 18, 15, 13, 10 and 7 are my proof. Every day for the past 22 years, I have been a mother. I have 2 children in heaven waiting to meet me as well. I am a mother. My husband and I struggled with the pain of infertility, and then God opened my womb and I became, a mother. 

In order to be the mother I wanted to be, for many years I have educated my children at home. I am a mother, a “home school mother”. My husband has 2 careers, one  of which involves extensive travel, so often I am , a mother alone. I am a mother. I have reached out and nurtured and “adopted” people into our family and spiritually nurtured them and cared for their souls. I am a mother.

I have not yet graduated college, so I did not walk across a stage, turn a tassel or receive cards of honor for the accomplishment. I have done 1000’s of hours of volunteer work in many capacities, but never really gotten a card, an award, a bouquet or anything like some do on “Administrative Assistants Day” or “Teachers Day” or “Headmistress Day”. I have not received a paycheck in 20 years. I am a mother. No one has given me “Employee of the Month” or any other awards or recognition of service in my 20 plus year chosen career field. I am a mother.

I do not resent any one else receiving award, gifts, bouquets or recognition and thanks on their birthday, graduation, promotion or advancement. I am a mother. Let me have a day. A day for my children, my husband and my community to remind me that what I do is important, and worth continuing to do well, because honestly, sometimes I am tempted to quit.  Often I have cried due to my lonely road, lack of support and just plain old exhaustion.

I am compassionate, I care about people’s feelings and I enter often into the concerns of those who struggle with many things. After all, I am a mother.

My heart needs the boost that I receive from the annual day of encouragement and honor that is specific to me and other women who have done the work of mothering. It wets my eyes when my church takes 5 minutes to cheer me on, it lasts at least through the brunch that follows. It helps me see clearly through the challenges that do not relent. I am a mother.

It’s just a few minutes on social media or in church, it’s only a day. It helps me to remember to thank my own mother for her years and tears and blood and sweat and all that goes with being a mother. We all are here because someone was a mother.

I am a Lover of Mother’s Day, and thankful for those who let me have it, without worrying about everyone else just for a minute. I feel for those whose relationships with their mothers are challenged, honestly, my own has it’s rough spots. I understand about imperfect family dynamics in families, and loss and longing. I promise I do. I am, a mother.

I want the card. I want to breathe a sigh of relief, in church and at lunch, with a corsage or a banquet or a song or my children doing a good deed. I am a mother, let me have my day. I won’t come and rain on anyone else’s parade, I won’t rub it in, I wear my work on my face and on my sleeves, please give Mother’s this Day, to celebrate  or grieve, the lives they have brought or desire or have lost as they each please.

Happy Day to all who Mother along with me, to mother’s yet to be, to those whose womb will never see, a child, but whose hearts take in and love all the while. I am a mother.

With love,

Sherry

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We buy ahead on the life we think we want
Looking into the days ahead
As though our crystal ball was so clear
To show us what will be when the payments are made
The life we imagine is likely too big or too small
For what we need when we take the deed
Certain to be different on the day we arrive
Keys in hand, do we pull into the drive
Or put a sign in the yard
Consult the stars
To know who we will be
Once the seasons roll again
The sports car gives a thrill
Gets there fast
Only room for two
Old couples erect mansions
Fill them full of treasure
Collected in a life so temporary
The passages
No matter how well we think we’ve planned to navigate
Can close in like caves
Or leave us out on display
In a glass house with no shade
Whether we prefer things settled
Leave them open to the end
Our vision is marred by generations
Behind and ahead
Cluttered with dreams unfulfilled
Those yet to live

Mothering

 

It’s tough

It’s tender

The heart often bends and needs to mend

As you try to be, all you can for those who depend on you for everything

As they separate and become closer to grown

The burden does not really lessen

You know you will fill the memories

With good and bad

Triumphs and failures

Children look to parents to be whole and well

An example of how

To live and to love

Time be kind to the weak places

Give my children grace to overlook my mistakes

May they think of me favorably

May I learn more of how God really is and how He loves

Show them His ways

Joy come surround

Grace fill the house

In between the messy life and the loud

Strengths hold

Love be the tie that binds

May mothers have the eyes to see themselves realistically

To give each child the best they can and trust God

To mind the gap

Keep the peace

Make the ends meetImage

Don’t mistake your first crush for your real love
Don’t let one that got away get in the way of the one who will stay
Don’t let a bruise that smarts stop you from living whole hearted
Don’t let rejection keep you so self-protected
Don’t wait too long, don’t rush in too soon
Don’t be afraid of loves binding you
Do guard yourself against lesser passions
Do value the gifts you possess, you are smashing
Do take time to know yourself
Do open your eyes to love’s possibilities around you
Don’t get caught up in one type
Be flexible enough to let God give you what’s right
Do wait for the one who will be true and save the best of yourself
You will never regret not being foolish or holding out

The heart pours out
It’s treasures like a cavern hidden under the earth
The Fortune hunters come searching with lights and pick axes
To dig and take the things of worth
Then they leave, pouches filled, happy to have gotten,
No matter scorched earth
Takers. Opportune.
Filled, until they use up what they see
On to the next hunt for what will fill the need.
Don’t give what is rare to a passerby
Don’t share with a fool, what only a king should have for his eyes
Gluttons who have shown they are willing to pillage
Should not eat at the table of privilege